​A reflective guide to understanding yourself, your relationships, and the space between.

Paperback - £12.99

Hardback - £16.99

Life’s Three Fires is a grounded and accessible guide for anyone who wants to understand themselves more deeply and make sense of the relationships that have shaped their life. It introduces a simple metaphor built around three Fires. The Self Fire, the Others Fire, and the Shared Fire. Together, they offer a way of understanding how you relate to yourself, how you respond to others, and how connections form, strain, or grow.
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The book brings together lived experiences, therapeutic themes, and reflective exercises in a way that is easy to follow and rooted in everyday life. It gives readers language for patterns that are often hard to describe and invites a steady, thoughtful approach to understanding themselves and the people around them.

Inside the book, you will find ideas and reflections that help you:

• Understand what you bring into your relationships.
• Explore the boundaries you set and how they are shaped.
• Notice the patterns you repeat.
• Reflect on communication, expectations, and connection.
• Recognise how past experiences influence present relationships.
• Understand the difference between your inner world, someone else’s, and the space between.

The aim is not to provide a checklist or a set of rules. It is to offer a practical and human way to pause, reflect, and understand your experiences with more clarity.​

Who this book can help:

Life’s Three Fires is suitable for:

• People wanting clarity and self-understanding.
• Anyone trying to understand their relationship patterns.
• Readers reflecting on their past and how it shapes them now.
• Counsellors, coaches, and educators who value simple visual metaphors.
• Couples hoping to communicate with more honesty.
• Anyone who appreciates reflective and grounded psychological guidance.

How this book took shape:

​This book grew from many years of counselling conversations. Over time, I noticed repeating themes in how people understood themselves, how they related to others, and how they navigated the space between. My practice is influenced by humanistic, relational, and attachment-informed ideas, and these influences gradually shaped the Three Fires into a metaphor that people could connect with.

The metaphor developed as a straightforward way to support people in making sense of what they bring to relationships, the boundaries they set, and the patterns they repeat. The ideas of the Self Fire, the Others Fire, and the Shared Fire emerged over time as a simple language for describing how people experience themselves, how they respond to others, and how connections take shape.

Life’s Three Fires brings these ideas together in a form that is reflective, accessible, and grounded in lived experience. It invites readers to pause, understand what supports them, notice what unsettles them, and explore their relationships with honesty and awareness.

​Where to buy:

Life’s Three Fires is best experienced in a physical format and is available via Three Fires Press.
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Paperback: £12.99
Available via Three Fires Press (fulfilled by The Great British Bookshop).
A 10% discount is available at checkout with the code HURRY10. 

Hardback: £16.99
Available on Amazon.

eBook: £4.49
Available on Amazon Kindle for readers who prefer a digital format.